the sun is setting

on an old chapter and now begins another. There is a change coming that is both BIG and small at once. I got my own place and will be moving out of the apartment that Mike and I set up together. We are still together so it's not that much will change between us (at least not the good things, I hope) but it is certainly an adult decision about taking care of our personal beings and giving ourselves the space to make things work.

In some moments I am ecstatic. Ready for the new adventure, ready to run and to sit on the beach to watch sunsets such as the one here. And then there are the moments that I cringe at the thought of change. There are the moments that I still want to believe that this is somehow someone's fault. In my heart, I know that this is just life. There is no fault at play. Truly, this is an opportunity to reclaim the self and be more whole.

The picture above is from a Google search of "Hermosa Beach". I relate to it I guess. A darkness in the foreground and yet a bright shining sun on the horizon.

hectic day=quick day

Today was a crazy day at work and I am actually quite grateful for it. I was soooooo tired because I was up until about 2am last night. Still feeling incredibly raw from the issues brought up by the cleanse, I totally ate wrong and did other "bad for me" things yesterday. Most of the morning was spent trying to figure out how to get out of the office and back to my bed but luckily the work kept coming and I forgot to be tired. Well, I did cave and have some coffee. I didn't want to I swear! But I did round things out a bit by eating vegetarian and mostly raw all day. That certainly helped. I want to keep that up as long as possible. Was able to work through a pretty fierce Burger and Fries craving but I know now that a craving is totally different than the feeling that comes after eating dead food. I am very happy wtih my decision to eat well today. This post will be short, just wanted to check in. Am feeling quite a bit better today due to some insightful talks with co-workers regarding surrendering to my present and also the theraputic nature of being silly. *Phew* I really needed that.

back in the land of "eaters"

Well, let me just say that the gift of fasting is the glory of tasting the foods you missed. Never a big fan of OJ, the fresh squeezed OJ tasted insanely good yesterday. I got to about 5pm on OJ alone and then decided I had to push the boundaries and went to whole foods for some veggie soup. I ended up buying a sourdough roll as well. I was not supposed to go beyond the juice on day one but I had no real problems. I ate the food extremely slow. A small soup and the roll took me about 3 hours to eat. Gotta admit I was scared. But then after an hour and no issues, I ended up pushing again and ate two small dark chocolate squares. Still no issues. I think I ate more than my body really wanted but it was actually quite pleasant.

I don't know what I was thinking today but I ate some pop tarts and immediately felt sleepy and fuzzy headed. Those things have gotta be so bad for you. Bad planning was a big culprit there. I also have to remember the beauty of eating slowly. That was one of the things I did on the fast, and yesterday that really helped me. I am terrible about scarfing down food.

Also of note is that my bowels haven't quite awoken so I am looking forward to getting my intestines empty again. There is always the smooth move tea but I am trying to avoid that. I can feel the weight of the bread I ate yesterday. It is going to be a challenge, but I am looking forward to eating more raw foods. I certainly notice the difference.

Day 10

Well, yesterday was a crappy day. I was an emotional wreck and today I literally feel hungover. Therefore, I will break the fast today. I know a lot of people would consider my cleansing "just beginning" but I truly feel that this may not be the proper fast for me. Not once during the cleanse have I had anything remotely resembling "euphoria" or high energy. It has been an emotional roller coaster. Sometimes I am not sure it was worth it but I did get some lessons out of it. Mostly, it has brought to light some of the issues that I really need to work on-self-esteem and honesty with self, trust.

So for today and part of tomorrow I will start on the fresh citrus juice and then move to veggie broth. I am really sad today so I have only had water so far. We are riding our bikes into Culver City so I am going to get some juice at M Cafe....

It seems as though my weight was waiting to come off as I lost two pounds yesterday alone. This makes for a total of 7 pounds. In the future, I am trying to incorporate more regular exercise into my routine and try and eat more raw foods in my diet.

I am going to sign off for now.

I am having a reallllly hard time today. Trying to take it all minute by minute but I just cannot stop the food cravings....I don't know what that means but I am going to go on the forum and try and find some advice. If tomorrow is like this too, I don't think I will go past ten.

Days 8 and 9

So I didn't get around to posting yesterday but I felt much much better than I had on day 7. During the day I felt pretty normal but I was still struggling with the lemonades. I think I only got in about 5 or 5 and a half servings. In our little office refrigerator I had stored some maple syrup and I overestimated how much was there. It was only enough for about 4 servings so I had to make that last the day since I didn't want to buy another expensive thing of ms. I guess I am getting used to a not full belly. The work day was okay, somewhat non-eventful but I tried to get a lot of water in. We also had to drive to Claremont for Michael's sister's birthday party. The food looked really good but I didn't cave. Mike's mom said it looked like my cheeks were caved in. I guess the weight loss is finally starting to kick in. It was a relatively uneventful day. My teeth are definitely more sensitive though. I find it hard to try and rinse my mouth out after drinking the lemonade because it feels like I am contantly drinking it. Was going to take a tongue picture before bed last night but was lazy and didn't do it. I also skipped the SWF because I need to rebel from the cleanse somehow. The day before had been so challenging for me, I needed to try and get revenge on the cleanse. Stupid. I know that only slows this whole thing up. So I am back to the SWF this morning and am trying to get much more water in. I want my tongue to turn pink so I can be done with this.

Looking at today's tongue picture, I definitely see an improvement in "pinkness". Eran said he'd bet that I go pink on day 12 or 13. We'll see. I don't think I will be quitting tomorrow. I sort of feel unfinished but if I am not pink by day 15, I think I am still going to stop. Never say never, I guess but that's pretty much where I am at. So I will committ to SWF every day until the end of the cleanse and trying to get extra water in. May go for a sauna at the gym later.

On day 7 I was feeling very discouraged because I hadn't really lost much weight at all. As of today, day 9, I have lost about 5-5.5 pounds since I started. That seems like way less than everyone else but I can't compare myself to others. It also made me realize how messed up I am over my body image and that I did this a bit more for vanity reasons than I thought. I knew i wanted to lose some weight but I guess it just got really in my face when I was honest with myself about how disapointed I was over the lack of weight lost so far. From my understanding, this is a CLEANSE, not a weight loss system. Weight loss is just one of the side effects. Don't get me wrong, I did do this for other reasons too that I think are healthy and valid but rendering it somewhat useless when I wasn't losing weight was an ugly experience. I figured I would quit on day 10 because I felt I had learned the major lesson: "don't do things for the wrong reasons" and that I should eat well and exercise more. However, now I am starting to feel more aligned with carrying out the cleansing portion and really want to get to the goal of a clear tongue. Who knows. I do really miss food though. I see that abstaining completely from certain foods may be the only way that I can avoid my addictive relationship with them. Not sure if I can do that for now but they way I am programmed, I have a hard time stopping eating cookies once I start....

I put on a pair of pants this morning that haven't fit for a few months and now they feel great. Guess that means that my body is changing. I am supposed to go over to a neighbor's house to help with a fish fry. That is going to be a bit tough so I don't know how long I will be staying there. A big juicy burger, some cornmeal fried fish and some french fries with lots of ketchup sounds heavenly right now. These darn cravings have been rough....Well, I guess I'll see ya on day 10!

Rough Morning

Wow, I think it was my own fault but that was a TOUGH one. I am just coming out of about three hours of nausea and chills. Although from what I have read, day 7 can be a doozy, I am thinking that this is the fault of my bc pill. I realized I forgot to take one yesterday so I took it at night and then took the regularly scheduled pill this morning. Lots of estrogen and an empty stomach do not go hand in hand. Speaking of, there are some conflicting ideas about taking the pill and doing this cleanse as many consider the pill to be a toxin that it would be ironic to continue on while doing this. I decided to go with the group that feels it is okay. I hadn't had any issues until today and I probably would have had this issue even if I wasn't on the cleanse. Am a bit sensitve to those stupid pills which I am not so fond of. Unfortunately or Fortunately, I am more fond of them than of the idea of having a child right now so I guess that's just the way the cookie crumbles.....MMMMM cookies.....

The sad side effect of all this though is that I was only able to get down one glass of lemonade this morning.

-0------------------some time later-------------------
so I got home a little while ago and I just had my second glass of lemonade. I feel much much better. I might not do 15 days. I won't do less than 10 but I don't know about the 15 anymore. I will expand upon this at a later time.

I can't sleep so I figured I would chronicle some of the thoughts running around my head...Got a massage tonight and I was trying to look at my fears. It seems they revolve around 'FAILURE'-a profound fear of failure. But what is failure, really? When I think about it outside the box it seems to me a greedy thing. It doesn't account for the benefit of the experience itself. A shortchanged focus on outcome. So why is it that I fear it? Does it even exist if your perspective does not acknowledge it?

I've been pretty cool with LA since I came back last year this time but tonight I feel like LA has really fucked with my head. I mean, I just don't feel "good enough" here. Not pretty enough, not skinny enough, not talented enough, not aggressive enough, not slutty enough, not unique enough. Just not enough. And that makes me sad. Because I know I am enough. More than enough but I've got someone else's standards in my brain. LA is the epicenter of the female mindfuck. We've got so much plastic surgery and anorexia around here it is insane. I joke about it but shit, I want to get a mild case of anorexia real bad like. But what would it take to make me feel "enough"? I think about moving to somewhere different, outdoorsy like Colorado or something. Not so far that I feel like I am a world away (like I felt in NY) but not SF or LA. This is a thing I've always done really, this switcheroo thingymajig. I get "urbaned out" and need to retreat. There is a certain level of excitement that I really enjoy in LA but sometimes I just plain feel like it hurts my heart. I would love to be somewhere that isn't so centrally located within this hollywood scene. I want priority to be on being active, enjoying the seasons and doing things that don't revolve around material prestige. Damn, this cleanse is bringing out my inner hippy big time....She may be the most honest me though. I want fleece and cold noses, hair that smells like burning wood and air that is sweet. Hard wood floors and tea kettles and fresh figs in the summertime. Flowers picked on the twilight walk.

This year has been hard in terms of seeing how sexist the world still is or maybe I should say how sexist hollywood is. I am really curious to know what would happen if there was a huge movement among media sources and that men were all depicted with enourmous dongs. Just everywhere, perfect man abs and huge cocks. Seriously. That's basically what is going on right now with women----everything airbrushed and plastic. LA is like living inside a magazine or tv. I know it's all a part of a fantasy but the consequence seems so unworth it. And where the hell did these fantasies come from anyway?
So instead of just bitching about it on a blog, I have done something. Well I did this a while ago really but I am still waiting for the package...I signed up to get trained to run self-esteem workshops for young women. Out here I think it is a neccesity. Believe it or not, I can be more confident than most and I will be the first to say that it's brutal in here.

Even though I am feeling really dumpy these days and DID start this cleanse partially because I wanted to reclaim my self image, I've only lost 3 pounds since I started the MC. I'm not focusing on that but I would be lying if I didn't say that I was surprised and frankly, disapointed. However, I know that I have to get in as much lemonade as I need and that this is more so helping me find my way back to something that will hopefully help me stay aligned with taking better care of myself, mind and body. Looks like someone needs to go camping!

Here is today's tongue picture. Thought I would let you all in on the fact that I am basically Gene Simmons in female form...except I'm not a jerkoff.

I really thought I noticed a lot more white fuzz but again, looking at the other photos I can't tell. Well I am going to lie down now. Having weird thoughts that don't benefit me. I'm scared of a lot----this isn't a new realization but it is a frustrating one that repeats over and over to me. But I will write more tomorrow. Good night.

Is this what heaven looks like?

I woke up early (5am) to do the salt water cleanse and a bit to my dismay, I found that I was still eliminating well past 6:30a. The ride to work was touch and go for a second there but I made it and no major damage has been done...So far today has been the best day I have had yet. My energy is more balanced and I feel quite good. I made a big batch of lemonade while I waited for the SWF to take effect but I haven't had any yet. This seems to be the growing challenge for me, actually taking in the calories...The unfortunate outcome of this is the tortuous google image search I just did "cookies and cupcakes"....Man, I am such a sugar addict.

The rest of the evening last night went okay. I was able to take a few minutes to meditate and I think that was just what I needed. Will follow up tonight with more meditation. I focused my gratitude on having the opportunity to be good to my body and spirit. A major motivator for this cleanse was to get more in touch with my spirituality and yet I wasn't taking enough time to allow myself to go there. Yesterday was hard mostly because I was fighting this whole thing. I was bitter that I couldn't eat and felt tired. Once I embraced the cleansing that was taking place, a lot lifted. The early morning has certainly made me miss the pep of coffee but I know that I will get through it.

Was talking with my friend Jen and found out that she is vegan. This was a great revelation in that I might actually not have to feel guilty trying to talk people into eating at M Cafe de Chaya or Real Food Daily-----two of my favorite macrobiotic joints. Also found out that a female author I love who wrote "the hip chick's guide to macrobiotics" is teaching a few classes in Santa Monica on Macro cooking and theory. Jen also told me about some great sounding classes through "sporkies"---I think that is what it is called, a vegan sister duo. Lots of cool stuff.
I have kept my evening clear tonight to have some quiet time to meditate and marinate on some of the things I would like to direct myself towards once this cleanse is over. I don't know how I feel about going raw but I would certainly like to get much more living food in. Thinking about trying to omit my beloved red meat and perhaps chicken too. When I lived up at Heartwood, (massage school in Humboldt) I ate vegetarian with wild salmon once every two weeks and looked and felt great. I worry a lot with raw, vegan or macro diets about getting enough satisfying protein in but as many people before me have pointed out, we are a little protein paranoid as a society. It's easier to get it in than we think. But I do enjoy a nice steak once in a while.....

so here is my tongue picture of the day...Mike's camera is out of batteries so I am using mine that has less pixels. I thought that my tongue was getting pinker, but then I thought it was getting a thicker coating. Looking at the photos, I really cannot tell.

I also think I am going to go back to organic lemons once the ones I bought run out. Also realized that I had my maple syrup out on the counter when I was supposed to have it refrigerated and although it smelled fine, I am convinced it tasted a little weird. Anyway, moved on to new syrup and all is right with the world....;)

Day 5-nothing special to report

So I keep waiting for this feeling of euphoria and high energy that everyone is talking about but I don't really have it. I have had bouts of "giddyness" but no real high energy thing. May not be getting enough lemonade in... Am averaging about 6-7 servings which is about all I can take. Now that I am back to work I am going to try and up the number and see if I feel better. I do notice that my tongue seems to be losing a bit of the white coating already. That is probably a good sign. There isn't much coming out the other end either. I just can't imagine that I would be almost through cleansing my intestines.

I was steadily losing about a pound a day but oddly enough today I gained some weight. Our scale is a bit weird sometimes but I am not too concerned. I feel a little bloated.

Today was my first day back at work and I think I am experiencing a bit of an emotional low. It's kind of hard to be at work when you feel off. I'm seem to be having cravings today that I thought had went away. I've had almost four lemonades so far but I am really missing food and am just generally "dumpy".

The gala was interesting last night. The songs went pretty well and I ended up singing an a cappella version of the national anthem as well. I was worried I was going to blank on some lyrics but things went off without a hitch. The food looked really good but Mike sweetly told me that it wasn't great at all. He ate about four rolls which usually means that the main course isn't tickling his fancy. He has been really great during this thing. :) It was slightly awkward telling the servers that I wasn't eating. One of them actually noticed my lemonade mixture and said,
"oh, you are doing a cleanse! Got it".
I asked her if she had ever done it and she said no but that friends had. When I told her I was looking to go 15-20 days both her and Mike said, "WHAT!?". We may have to ease him into that one. But who knows if I will make it that long. I think I could but unless I start to feel better soon, I don't know that I will really want to do it that long. The one benefit that I really enjoyed last night was being able to smell the food without wanting to eat it. Peter Glickman talks about being able to do that with foods that he knows aren't good for him. He says he kind of looks at them like "scratch and sniff" stickers. But to do that would be pretty awesome. I find that my sense of smell and my sense of discipline are right next to each other often egging one another to do something stupid.

I skipped the salt water flush today because I didn't want to have to deal at work. I might try and get up early tomorrow to do it but I am not sure. It's a bit of trek from my office to the restroom, I don't know how much I want to deal with that. It was bad enough without it.

Okay, I am going to post a new tongue picture later on today.

Day 4-The Gala

Today is day 4. I was supposed to go to work today but felt crappy, literally. I had been awoken in the night to find that I really, really had to poop. It's an odd feeling when you urgently have to go but then have little to show for it in "post poop investigations"....

I do feel that the hunger has substantially subsided. Yesterday, Mike and I went on a little hike out in Venice/Marina Del Rey area and although the walk itself was great, everytime we passed an area that smelled of food I thought I was going to attack someone. Just tried to remember that it was supposed to be the worst day as far as cravings are concerned and if I could get through just that day, things would likely be easier tomorrow. This has proven to be the case as I had to kind of force myself to drink some of the lemonade today. It has helped me feel more alert though.

The unflattering photo on the right is of my tongue. I would like to do this cleanse until the growing white coating on my tongue turns to a healthy pink. I guess some people brush their teeth only with water while cleansing but I am not down with that. It may throw off things but I have had to stick to my regular routine of toothpaste brushing. I have noticed that the white coat is thickening though. Thought the best way to chronicle the experience would be to put up daily tongue photos. Might put up a few from the gala as well.

Speaking of the Gala....it's tonight. I'm a little nervous as my energy is definitely altered. I haven't yet experienced the heightened energy that a lot of people speak of on this cleanse. It is my hope that tomorrow will show some of that. I might skip the salt water flush tomorrow too and switch to the tea in the am/pm for the workweek. Even though the flush is certainly getting easier to get down, I am finding that the eliminations are taking longer to set in. Making the SWF experience take about 2 hours or longer to be complete. I got the whole quart down in one drink today. I am finding that if I count the gulps, it makes it easier. The cramping is also less but then when you gotta go, you better be close to the bathroom or else. I don't know that I want to have to deal with that at work. Also to be considered is that we have bathrooms that seem constantly occupied and Mike told me this morning that my "eliminations" were really dreadful in the smell department. We got a good laugh out of the gargantuan stink coming out of my tushie but I felt bad for him. But oh yeah, back to the discussion of energ----uh oh, gotta eliminate---okay, I'm back. So energy...well, I feel much more spacey yet peaceful. I have thought about trying to increase my lemonade but after 7 servings I am pretty much done. I think the fact that I have been having my first serving well after 11am probably makes it harder. I bet when I get to work I will drink more and we will see how my energy is then. Even still, feeling "fine" is way different than how I am used to feeling. I don't have that same grounded feeling but I am trying to embrace this. I notice that my disposition is more patient and loving. Thought I might be more irritable but I don't think so. Also noted that during our walk yesterday, I did not have any muscle fatigue. It was good to get a little exercise. What I am working on today is getting my songs in order for the gala and trying to allow food smells to be a pleasant experience but not one that invokes hunger. Peter Glickman said in his book that when he smells food that he wants to eat but that isn't healthy for him, he kind of thinks of it as a scratch and sniff sticker. I would love to be able to do that. Okey-doke, I am going to go rehearse now.

Days 2 and 3

Most of day one went quite well. A lot of the fears I had about the sugar not working for me subsided as I felt perfectly fine. I had plenty of energy and really was not hungry. I certainly got cravings but as I read in Peter Glickman's book, I realized that my cravings were linked to that undigested food moving through my system. Thoughts of ethiopian food constantly taunted me.
The evening ended with quite a headache that the book says is due to a caffeine habit. It lasted into the second day but is gone now.

Onto day 2:
Mike worked today as well so I had the apartment to myself to do my salt water cleanse and read close to the bathroom...I had several eliminations but they were mainly watery with some mucous in them. Kind of gross but not so bad. I weighed myself in the morning before the salt water and had lost exactly one pound. Getting the salt water down was awful like the first day but I did it in about 4 minutes.

A bit more tired today, I layed around a lot reading the Peter Glickman book and taking it easy. I had made plans a few weeks back to meet some friends for lunch in Long Beach that I didn't want to flake out on so those were my only solid plans for the weekend. I made a thirty oz batch of the lemonade (3 servings) and headed to Long Beach with Monique and Jeff. I was a bit spacey so I am glad that we were all able to car pool. Margaret, Max, Jacob, Rudy and Benito all showed up and I was so grateful for the laughter that ensued. It was hard to not eat but probably not as bad as it could have been. I definitely think I have put a clear boundary for myself that I am not going to break this cleanse for at least 10 days. I'd really like to do the full 20 the more I think about it. Everything in my research seems to say that the most spiritual aspects of the cleanse happen after 10 days. These are certainly motivators in my decision to take on this challenge. By the time we got back on the road, I was sooooo hungry. I had finished all the lemonade I had brought and just wanted to devour anything and everything. I kept getting this intense craving for some crusty french bread....oh man, just writing that sounds sooooo good right now. I could go off on an orgiastic list of what I think I want to eat right now but I will spare you the delicious details.

Perhaps the hardest part of yesterday was having to go to the grocery store to get more lemons when I was soooo hungry. I had to really get in and out of there quickly. However, the bright side of all of this was that once I did have the lemonade, I felt much better. Had my Chocolate Smooth move tea and went to bed. I had steeped the tea a bit longer than normal on accident (I lost track of time) and it gave me some cramps in the middle of the night. I even had to get up twice to make little and somewhat unfulfilling poops in the wee hours.

Day 3:
My stomach was still cramping this morning but I am having eliminations with a lot of mucous. In case you can't tell, this is a good thing. ;) No headache at all but a little bit of achiness and a thicker white coating on my tongue. I definitely seem to be on track as far as today being the most intense detox day. I've also felt more cold than normal (supposedly a result of my metabolism slowing down). Mike has the day off today so I think we may go on a hike. I want to be in a natural and peaceful setting and feel the sun. I need to get some lemonade in me cuz I can tell I am hungry. Oh yeah, also lost exactly one pound again this morning. Feeling pretty good so far. Tomorrow will present the new challenge of doing this while working....I think I am going to allow myself to buy non-organic lemons because I am not using any of the peel. Tried to get all organic stuff but I read that it doesn't matter if the lemons are organic if you are squeezing them as opposed to putting them through a juicer. Okay, off to have my lemonade brunch!

Day 1-Now what exactly am I doing?

I just drank 32 oz of lukewarm water with 2 tsp's of sea salt dissolved in it. In about 3-5 minutes.

"wait a minute, what" you say?

uh oh, hold on. I think the maddness is starting. Ooh and only 14 minutes after I drank it.

Okay, I am back. That wasn't so bad but I am sure there is more where that came from. Oh dude, that would be so much funnier if you had also just drank a liter of friggin' salt water....but I digress.
In case you haven't figured it out by now, I am on day one of a 15 (perhaps 21) day master cleanse. Yes, this is the lemonade fast that some people rave about and others think is a joke. I have decided that I would figure out for myself.

I tried to do this a few years back and couldn't even get through day one. I don't think my body was responding well at all to the high sugar content of the maple syrup. But I feel like I am in a pretty different state these days and it just felt right.

Here is a list of my intentions for this cleanse:

-cleanse for the season change
-really take the time to flush out the bad crud stuck in my system (emotionally and otherwise)
-reprogram how I am eating (I believe that I have convinced myself that "cake" is one of the four major food groups)
-exert the personal discipline to do this
-slim down a little (in regards to this one, I know that some people really look down on those who do this to lost weight but I have to be honest that I am a bit beyond my comfort zone weight wise and therefore the side effect of this cleanse of weight loss does motivate me a bit. I realize that I will likely gain back at least some of the weight I lose which is fine. Mainly, what I see as restructuring my food preferences is the main reward and will balance out my health/weight.

Here are some of my fears:

-I know this is really a mind game so I am afraid of giving up and then getting down on myself. I am trying to look at it in a sense of "just do it, do not give yourself the option of failling". That usually gets me through things when I don't want to do them but I feel really firm right now about doing this for at least 4 days. I hear days 1-3 are the hardest.
-I have a performance on Monday and I am worried I will be having a low day but if I am "typical" most people say day 4 (which would be Monday) is one of the best days.
-I worry that this is the wrong type of cleanse for my body. As I have never reacted to sugar well (even though I am severly addicted to it) I hope that this cleanse won't just make current conditions worse.

Okay, now we've got fear and intentions out of the way. I am sure I will have more to write later. I've planned an easy day with a trip to Santa Monica in there. Going to get my dress for the Gala on Monday and also pick up a book on the cleanse that Eran highly recc. So for now, I will wait out the rest of this salt water flush and then get ready to go.

I drank the chocolate smooth move tea last night (steeped for 10 min) and I am happy to report that I had no cramps. Unlike now with the salt water. It worked quite well too as I had an elimination right after I woke up.

*Warning-if you can't take "poo talk" don't read this blog*

Okay, just had the second "water from ass" of the morning.

Anyway, I feel good about this and I will be working towards the goal of 15-21 days of this routine (6-12 cups/day of the lemon mixture, salt water flushes and senna tea).

Later,
Juni